If you understand what attachment style you are as well as other people, you really solve the mystery of how to pick the right partner for you.

You learn the different ways in which you put your partners at arm’s length.

Then you start feeling uncomfortable with so much closeness.

If you have an avoidant attachment style, If we look into this science, we understand that we’re all programmed to choose someone out from the crowd, make them special and unique to us and become attached to someone. The last style is the avoidant attachment style.

You’re easygoing and easy to get along with.

You don’t worry too much about the relationship and not being loved back.

If you have a secure attachment style, you also love to be close and intimate.

They tend to worry a lot about not being loved back and the reliability of the relationship.

They are also very sensitive to small threats that happen in a relationship.

Someone with an anxious attachment style loves to be intimate and close.

At the same time, it has to do with how preoccupied we become with the relationship.

It all has to do with how comfortable we feel with intimacy and closeness.

Let’s start with the anxious attachment style. You will start to think about what attachment style you are and what attachment styles other people in your life are. I really want to invite the listeners to listen carefully to these definitions. Understanding attachment is almost like learning a new language. They saw that, indeed, we do behave in accordance to those styles in adulthood. They wanted to see if those three styles that exist in children also exist in adults. In 1987, two researchers thought, “Maybe we have the same kind of attachment with our significant others.” The same system that’s in our brain related to how we attach to our parents is also related to how we attach to our partners. It was used to describe the way that children interact with their parents. These attachment styles were first described in children by a very famous researcher named Mary Ainsworth.

This is the product of research that’s been going on. In your book, it is termed “attachment styles.” As a starting point, will you share a brief description of each of the attachment styles for our listeners?Īttachment styles are not just something in my book. Your book discusses three main styles in which people perceive and respond to intimacy in romantic relationships. Amir Levine, author of Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How it Can Help You Find- and Keep- Love: I find that fascinating.

Attached dr amir levine